Sunday, April 18, 2010

Deployment Question #8--Does he want to go?

After Gunner's first deployment to Iraq, he received orders for Korea.  No one ever gets orders for Korea deleted, except Gunner.

Off he went on his second deployment to Iraq.

After that was over, he received orders for recruiting.  NO ONE gets orders for recruiting deleted.  The Friday before he was supposed to be there, they cancelled his orders.

Off he went on his third deployment to Iraq.

We PCSed to Colorado.  

When Gunner had orders for Korea and recruiting, he wasn't too excited.  It's not that he was dying to deploy, but then again he had spent years and years training for this job, so he also felt a sense of responsibility.  

I wasn't excited about him deploying, but I also felt that if he didn't go, he wouldn't be using his skills and his training as well, and I know he loves his job.

On the other hand, I know people that do anything and everything to get out of deployments. (NOTE:  NOT EVERYONE, there are some people that are just not deployable or in a unit that is going, it's the luck of the Irish.) Do you think people should have to complete at least one tour?  

So my question of the day, does he like deploying for the Army aspect of it?  (Let's be honest, most of them don't like to be away from their families, so that's always a reason to not want to go)  Does he feel a sense of obligation to deploy?  If he does have a sense of obligation or commitment to the task at hand, does that bother you?

P.S.  If you have any questions you want to see posted please email me at armybloggerwife AT gmail DOT com.  


MG said...

Right now, we are in one of those "luck of the Irish" situations where it seems that it may be a bit more time before C deploys again. It's driving him crazy! He really wants to deploy again (crazy, I know) and it kills him that some of his peers are getting ready to go back over and he is where he is at.

Now don't get me wrong, he is excited to be in this job, and we had expected to deploy quite a lot with this unit, but as it turned out they are going though a quiet phase, which is nice.

Honestly, it seems weird that we have no deployment looming over us, it's all we have ever known in our Army life. I'm honestly concerned that it will make the next deployment much harder.

Sara said...

Joe told me that he was ready to deploy. He told me that over and over and over. And then finally when it came, I think he was actually relieved. Joe has been in the Army for almost 5 years now. He was in Germany for 2 of them straight out of AIT. He got orders all the time to deploy, but it never happened. When we went to Kansas, he was again in a Chemical unti and no one needs those downrange right now. But again, he came up on orders and they were canceled. I think he felt bad being a SGT and never deployed. He said it was a respect thing, he said it was an experience thing. He said that he had been training everyday for something he never thought he would get to do. And now that he's there, he thinks the whole thing is exciting. No one likes to be away from their family and home, and no one likes to use the awful toilet paper and take combat showers. But I think he will come home wearing that patch on his arm very proudly. So yeah, he wanted to deploy. And it took me a long time to be okay with that.

Joannafesto said...

Well, my husband ALWAYS wants to go -- ALWAYS. Against all reason and logic, he wants to go. Most people run away from gun fire, but some people run into it. My husband runs into it. His courage is part of the reason I married him, but sometimes it makes me a little nervous.

Jessica said...

I'm in the same boat as Sara. My husband is a SPC, but he's had a chip on his shoulder since he hasn't deployed. Now that he actually is deployed, I know all the pictures are going to be where I can see the patch on his arm for deployment.

MRS Jen McNeil said...

Funny that this is the question of the day because its exactly what I am dealing with right now. My hubs is in C co. They deploy Feb-March sometime, and a lot of his soldiers just got pulled to B Co. B compnay is scheduled to deploy july sometime. My hubby talked it over with me,and (after a gained composure over my stomach) I told him yes.

Well, wondering what the question is? I'll tell you....

"Would you be okay if I volunteered to go to B Co. with my guys?"

This is what he trains He loves his job, like your hubby does(he's 21B, combat engineer)His soldiers are all newbies, and have never deployed before. Michael told me that he feels obligated as their Sgt. to be there for them. I am totally proud of him of his committment to his career.

At first(during his second deployment when I was preggo with Hailey) I was hurt and upset when he wouldnt put off deploying for 1 more month so he could be here for the birth, but I understand it now. (now that the hormones are gone! LOL) These men arent just his "guys" or his soldiers...they really are family to him. He protects them and has their back no matter what.

I know now that his loyality to the Army and his soldiers is completly seperate from me and the kids. Its not always easy for me to seperate the two, because sometimes I get jealous like "well what about us." but then I feel selfish and remember that we agreed for him to join the Army together. It was a mutual descion therefore must be a mutual give and take, if you will.

If Michael is in garrison for too long he gets antsy. Heck, he was ready to deploy like 3 months after he got back. He loves his job and hes great at what he does. Sitting aroound doing litter patrol just doesnt cut it for him. I do however agree that everyone should do at least one tour. Some guys have been 3,4,5 or more times while some have never gone. I think that that isnt fair. But who said the Army was fair???

sheesh, now that Ive written a book for you LOL...Im going to go. Keep up the deployment questions...I LOVE them!!!

Julie the Army Wife said...

I think my husband is ok with it and knows it is part of the job. The being away from family part does really suck but I think he is really ok with going.

The Army really isn't fair it seems. Even within the same type of job. Some have to go every other year and others don't. Just seems like a luck thing.

Vi said...

My husband goes back and forth with wanting to go and then wanting to get out completely. He has done this his entire military career. So when he makes whatever comment be it deploying or getting our or whatever, I just tell him I will support what ever he decides. I know he loves his job. He just misses the kids so darn much when he is gone. If we didn't have kids I know he would be a lifer, but right now I don't know what his decision is.

On a Journey said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
On a Journey said...

"Does he like deploying for the Army aspect of it?
My husband does enjoy deploying for the "Army Aspect" of it. He feels that the military is his calling and that he needs to do his job to the best of his ability. Our first deployment we had no choice of the matter so it was not a matter to fight over. I was sad he had to go (since we just found out we were pregnant) but I knew I could not change it.

I had a much harder time with the second deployment. Mainly because three months after he got back from his first tour we had a really rough patch where he had a hard time emotionally. I was scared that it would be the same after a second deployment. Secondly he volunteered to deploy. He had been home for a year and a half and we knew a deployment was in the future so he wanted to have some control over when he went so he picked the time (we were NG at the time).

We are now AD and he was up for a deployment in a few months but he is changing his MOS. However, I know that as soon as his schooling is over we will be on rotation to deploy and I *accept* that (meaning, I don't like it but I will deal).

To be completely honest it does bother me a little that he has such a strong feeling of obligation to deploy. I mean, I want him to have a strong feeling of obligation to be with us. And, my rational self knows that he does but it is hard when he so freely gives himself to the Army.

I do feel that everyone needs a turn overseas. Like other posts have stated: Some are on their 3rd, 4th, or 5th deployment. Let's spread the "love" a little. When you have a colonel that has been in for nearly 20 years and has yet to be deployed I find that extremely interesting.

Wiley said...

Sometimes I can't tell if DM enjoys the Army Aspect/wants to deploy at all. So it's a bit of yes and a bit of no. He (and I) see it as his duty and not only does he feel obligated to do his duty, but he enjoys it - doesn't always like the job and the job and the environment that come with it, but he likes the duty aspect.

I also can't fault him for wanting to go - I deployed and volunteered for it... those in glass houses and all that. But if he's excited about it, I at least want him to admit that he doesn't want to be apart from me. After that I am pretty good with it all. There's not much we can do to change it anyway, so we may as well suck it up as best we can.

Dawna said...

I know that Dh didn't want to go, but when it was initially discussed - when we were heading in this direction, knowing that he'd likely be deployed not long after being here - I could sense that he was torn. He didn't want to go, but I knew that he also felt a sense of duty, not so much to the Army or even a unit, but to his friends. A duty to have their backs...

Jeannette said...

Mine wants to go. It's not so much a obligation for him as a strategic career move. This life is what he was born to do and he wants to make the most of it and be the best he can. I knew that marrying him. It's a huge reason why I love him so much. I think a lot of military wives feel that way.

Queenie Jeannie said...

Well I'll tell you this...

Here at Gordon, there are tons and tons of people walking around without combat patches and IT PISSES ME OFF!!! Seriously? We've been at war since the fall of 2001. That's almost 9 years!! To have NEVER been to Afghanistan or Iraq in all that time when others have gone and gone and gone and gone just pisses me off.

Now if you are a private and you're new, ok. But I see SSG and above without them and I just call 'em p*****s in my mind. I think my look gives that impression too.

Thomas hasn't been to Afghanistan yet and he feels like he's "shirking" his duty, not that he's has any say in the matter.

Vintage Love and Photographs said...

I agree with the person above me. It saddens me that they keep using the same people over and over..I've heard of compensation for those people but honestly I don't think it's enough, not with PTSD, broken marriages, etc. The longest my husband has been home in the last 8 years is 14 months and I just don't think thats right when there are some who have not gone or gone once. But the military doesn't care about what's fair LOL

heather@it'stwinsanity said...

Here at Gordon there a lot of units that don't deploy because they are working for NSA. It's not that they are getting out of deployments, it's that the NSA soldiers don't ever deploy. And a lot of them get "stuck" here for years too. At least that's what I've seen. We've been here since 2005. My DH didn't deploy until he left here and went to Ft Lewis. It was never that he didn't want to deploy... it was that he was in a non-deployable unit.