Saturday, January 8, 2011

Thanks & New Problem--Bullying

Thanks for all the advice on potty training.  I once had Junior sit in his mess till he got tired of it--wouldn't you know, he didn't mind at all.  I had to put him outside at one point in the backyard, and he played nicely on the back porch while sitting in his own feces, singing happily.  He must get his stubbornness from his father.

I have tried making him clean himself up, but probably not as regularly as I should, so I'm going to give that a shot again.  He did it a few times and was happy as a lark.

My new problem is bullying.

My dear sweet Abs, who we have all come to know and love, has been bullied since the beginning of school.  I have fought with the school non-stop, demanding that they do something, and they always point it back to Abs, which 95% of the time is not the case.

Yesterday things came to a head when "he" attacked her and shoved her down.  Now I realize that these are 4th graders and that stuff like this happens (although being a 2nd grade teacher, my students knew better than to do anything to hurt anyone).  But, this has been consistently happening, although more on the harassment level--you're stupid, you're dumb, you're ugly, anything that he can say to cut her down.

The physical was more than I could handle, and I fired off an email demanding a response from them.  Their solution was to keep Abs out of her specials classes and therefore keep them separated.  Really?  She's not the problem.

I have had Abs moved, against her will.  That will probably backfire on me, but I couldn't let her deal with that anymore, and it was obvious that the school wasn't going to do anything.  The problem is that Abs loves the school, and I like that they are challenging her, but then there is this problem.
Publish Post
I'm frustrated.  It shouldn't be this hard to protect your child.  Any suggestions?


Allison @ I heart Change said...

Wow! I can't believe their response! This website is getting promoted here, maybe it can help:

Did I mention I can't believe the school's response? I'd be taking that to the school board or superintendant. That is unacceptable for them to say 'its her.' Possibly you could go to the school and spend some hours with Abs. Maybe knowing Abs has the support of her mom might limit that boys bullying?

Anonymous said...

That is assault. Call the police.

Amy said...


We live in TX and my kids belong to a district near Ft. Hood. There is a Zero Tolerance policy on bullying. My oldest has been bullied/harassed (all verbal, except a few intentional shoving incidents where the kid claimed it was an accident but my son told no one until way after the fact). The school takes this stuff seriously, even the verbal.

I cannot believe that they are allowing this to happen to your daughter. Heck - my younger son shoved a kid last year because the kid acted like he was about to bite him and MY son was the one who got into trouble even for defending himself! That is how seriously they take the bullying issue.

Like someone else mentioned, go above the administrators in the school. Go to the Superintendent and/or Board itself. If that doesn't do it, maybe talk to JAG for advice.

McMGrad89 said...

Remind them of Least Restricted Environment. Remind them that they are denying her rights to be in an appropriate setting and that they cannot keep her from attending specials. I hope it resolves soon. Keep fighting. In the end you know you are the only voice Abs has in that crazy district.

Anonymous said...

I would not only take it above and beyond the school, but since this is a recurring problem, i would absolutely speak with an attorney, and depending on what they say your options are, threaten/file a lawsuit against them for neglect.

They are neglecting to take care of an issue, that is resulting in your daughter being harassed. I would also bring it to the attention of the PARENTS of the kids who are harassing her.

I have NO tolerance for crap like that, and you can bet if my kid EVER treated anyone like those kids are treating your daughter, s/he would be in for a very rude awakening.

cj said...

I agree with Doc's girl. Get in touch with an attorney. There are numerous federal laws dealing with educating special needs and bullying is a hot topic right now. The school is failing to live up to its responsibilities.

The comment about the assault is also valid. It seems extreme, but 'he' did assault your daughter. Perhaps going that route would make the school officials understand how serious you are about their neglict.


Uncle Dan said...

It's a wonder that Em doesn't step in and deck the boy, after all it's family.

d.a.r. said...

I cannot believe the school is letting this fly. Contact the district. If that doesn't work, get ahold of the state school board. If that doesn't work...get an attorney. This is a hot topic at the moment and I cannot believe they would be that stupid.

I'm sorry for Abs :(

NWLC said...

Wow. That is a really disheartening response from the school.

Federal law mandates that schools protect their students from harassment and bullying based on their sex.

You may want to check out this resource we've developed: It’s Your Education: How Title IX Protections Can Help You.